Too many conservatives, myself included, have developed a negative view of our current leadership. We have looked only on the dark cloud and have failed to view the silver lining. It is time that we reconsider what living under Democrat leadership has meant to us. Let’s consider that very bright silver lining.
First, if you lived in Afghanistan, especially in Kabul, you had a very good chance of a free flight to the United States and a new life here with no passport or visa requirement. You only had to push your way up the gangplanks and onto the planes. For those who didn’t make it before the doors were closed, free skydiving was available as an alternative.
And women in Afghanistan have found that life is not so bad now that Biden got us out of there precipitously. There is equal opportunity for women, just as when the Americans were in control. Now, women can become suicide bombers just like the men!
If you cannot afford to buy a house or even rent one, no problem! It is pretty warm all year round in California and the cities offer free sidewalk space for you to set up a make-shift tent. Drugs are always available as well as free syringes, and if you forget to get a new syringe, you can just pick one up off the street where you camp. . . er, live. Also, you never have to worry about calling a plumber because you don’t need a bathroom. The sidewalks are all purpose. And no one tries to evict you. Ever!
Also, in most large California cities, as well as in New York City, if you need something from a pharmacy, or a new cell phone, or some new clothes, you don’t have to worry about buying them. You just stroll into the store, take what you want (up to $950’s worth) and stroll out again, bypassing the check-out. And if you need a little cash, just pick up less than $950’s worth for several days in a row and sell it all at an outdoor market. California and New York have eliminated the need to spend 8 hours a day slaving away at some job for a few hundred a week. Grab a few designer bags from Nieman Marcus, sell them, and you’ve got plenty of cash and in just a few minutes work per day!
If your math’s not so good because you dropped out of high school and you go over the $950 per day – – – no sweat! The Democrat D.A.’s going let you go with probation or community service anyway and no bail. They are letting murderers out of prison by the thousands, for humanitarian reasons they say, so why would they want to put you in for a piddling bit of pilfering? No. Life is good for what many Americans look down upon as “criminals!”
And if you are too lazy to stroll into a store and steal — er liberate some merchandise to sell for cash, then you don’t need to. In 2021, using COVID as the excuse, Biden had checks for $1400 sent to each adult earning less than $75,000, added to the extra unemployment money given to those who were not working, and up to $300 for each child in a family per month. Many have found this to be more money than they can make working at Walmart, and they get to watch the soaps all day to boot! What a bonus!
Need a new car? Go to Philadelphia and carjack one. Carjackings there have increased by 80% under Biden so there are plenty of people around to tell you how to go about doing it. Just ask anyone on the street!
With the spike in gas prices, we will soon be resorting to riding in horse and buggies like the Amish. And the lack of truck drivers to move goods from the California harbors may find us using wagons again. Soon heating costs may drive us to using wood burning stoves to heat our houses and funeral parlors will again purchase paper fans to hand out to churches to use when electricity becomes too expensive for air-conditioning. What a better way for our children to learn first-hand what life was like for our ancestors! Those Democrats really love teaching us history, even if now and then they make it up just to see if we can catch them!
Democrats like to divide us into groups, especially separating blacks from other Americans. They have instituted black “safe spaces” where others cannot go on college campuses, black only dorms, and black only graduation ceremonies. They can’t really help segregating us. It is in their genes. It’s just that before they called the blacks “slaves” and often made them live under horrible conditions. Now they say they are doing it to benefit black people. They still make them live in rat-infested hovels with trash on the streets and drug dealers on the corners, but they don’t call them slaves anymore and the places they live are not called plantations but Democrat-run cities. So, hey, if you are a white supremacist (I mean a real one, not just a conservative), you know, one of the 4% of Americans who would never vote for a black man or woman for president, then, here you are! Once again, life under the Dems is working in your favor!
Prices on everything we buy is rising from cars to houses to food on grocery store shelves. But the more we have to spend on these important things, the less we are likely to fritter away on frivolous things like vacations to Disney World with the kids. And the fact that new cars are missing from car lots and shelves in stores always have huge bare spaces in them where things that we want to buy and that should be there aren’t, well, that just saves us from spending too much money. We’ll need that money when we pay our taxes to pay for all the goodies that Democrats are sure we really, really should be provided with, whether we need them or not.
And as couples in the U.S. are having fewer children and black mothers are having lots of abortions, the Democrats have thought of an ingenious way to keep our population from falling: open up the country to the world! If you want to come to America and can buy a ticket to some central American country, there will be people to guide you through other countries and up to our border. We call it a border, but it really isn’t. A border of a country is the line that says “This is where our country begins and other countries end. You can’t come here to live unless we give you permission.” But that is such an unloving way to treat people! So Democrats welcome them with open arms, over 2 million of them since Biden took office. And they are from all over the world, even from countries that hate us! Well, the Bible does say “Love your enemies,” although I don’t think this is what Jesus meant. And anyway, most Democrats don’t believe in the Bible anyway, but it helps make those conservative Christians feel good about all those foreigners just walking into the country when they want. It gives us a chance to be generous, to be giving, to provide free schooling, housing, food, college tuition, health care. This generous government even sent a COVID relief check of $1400 to the Boston bomber, an immigrant turned terrorist who murdered people. But, hey, Democrats are very forgiving. . . of criminals!
Yes, life under the Democrats has a silver lining to that dark cloud. No, wait, that lining is getting awfully tarnished! It’s starting to look just as gray as the cloud! Have I been wrong about this? Surely not. . . .