Continuing on the plan by Daniel Buck to survive the COVID19 scourge by self-isolating, we confront points 2 – 6 of his plan. These, to refresh our memories are 2: Set small goals, 3, get out of the house and 4, wake up and dress up; 5, Relax. 6, keep a journal. 7, find a hobby. 8. Seek professional help.
Why set goals? With the uncertainty surrounding the spread of this disease, even the smallest goals, unmet, will give us pause to remember and regret not spending more time on meeting those goals. Mr. Buck was going to read, in the original, The City of God, by St. Augustine. That becomes not a goal, but a drudge task, for I have actually attempted to read this tome and come away frustrated from the effort. If you have to read for a goal, try something light and fluffy. I have always found that such a read is refreshing, and one of my first choices would be anything from Rex Stout about his rotund detective, Nero Wolfe. Not only are his novelettes easy and quick reading, but the good guy always wins.
Polishing off that point, we continue to his “get out of the house”. I thought the idea of isolating was to ward off the spread on this pernicious disease. A good deal of thought must go into how to navigate this without violating social norms or incidental contact with the unwashed masses. Vital trips, such as doctor offices, pharmacies and grocery stores are unavoidable, I suppose, but some ingenuity is required for more frequent forays into the public. My situation is quite ideal. I have a personal care person, and I manage to escape the “four walls do not my prison make” often. When the occasion arises, I climb into the car (shotgun seat only), Jane drives out and we go to whatever venue beckons that day. If our canine children are with us, I dogsit; if not, just read from my IPad. If you do not have this convenient manner of getting out of the house, find someone who will accommodate you in this way. Of course you would have to vet this person to make sure no mini bug can invade your isolation space.
To “wake up and dress up” was a waste of digital space. If we are isolated, whether by choice or government edict, to do this would just extend your usual work place into the home environment. For example, when I was teaching, my routine would be as follows: wake up, shave while opening my eyes, go to the closet to select the shirt, pants, tie and sweater or jacket for that day. Of course all had to be color coordinated lest any student or colleague be offended by my lack of sartorical correctness. This does not mean to lounge around in pajamas, but really comfortable clothes must be the first requirement for isolation/quarantine drapery. A related question must be asked on this point; do Niki and Paddy (the furry children) really care if I don’t shave or dress neatly. They couldn’t care less, unless I refused to shower for a week! (Of course, my keeper and daughter might object about the showering bit!)
One of his better ideas was to relax! Just throw up your hands and decide that this day nothing will be done unless it helps me unravel a little. Might just be a good day, after all!
To keep your sanity, DO NOT JOURNAL! This scenario beckons to a nightmare. If you begin, just know that the social distancing and self-or-imposed quarantine might go on for a long time. At first, such an exercise holds promise; every event, every nuance, every conversation holds fascination for us as we attempt to capture the thrill of aloneness. But in the 314th day of journaling the nation opens up and we are back to normal — family, job, the many people we haven’t interacted with in a long time. We caught ourselves sneaking out to Wal-Mart to pick up some journals to fill up and we assiduously write and write and write. Why? So some sociologist in the future can read what inanities we wrote so we did not break the line of serious journaling? So our grandchildren can look at our mundane, dull life 100 years hence? If I could just open a trunk we have, I can find my great-grandfather’s daily journal of what he did and where he went and what he sold in the years he peddled on the road. Some of that I cannot decipher, even though his handwriting is legible, but not much sense can be made of it as I do not really know how he lived. But to suddenly stop journaling after the nation opens up for business again would be counterproductive. We would feel guilty for not writing, and then our normal lives would be loaded with not being able to find the time, nor find the tidbits of our lives we could write down. Don’t journal!
The same advice goes for finding a hobby. Mr. Buck says he found his in a little woodworking. Good for him, but for most of us in this human blackout it would be a lot like useless journaling. Whatever hobby you find, remember that this nightmare will end. Back to work, back to more time to do those things in our normal existence, back to a filled agenda each day — and if you find an outlet in a hobby that clutters up that time, it is a counterproductive activity.
Some might say do some gardening or yard work, which would spruce up the place a little. But from years of watching, those weeds do not stop growing when we don’t have the time to root out the little useless plants. Each time we trudged home from work, that little hobby we acquired while isolating will crawl up our backs as we close the door to our houses.
Mr. Buck’s last point is “too little, too late”. If a person is so uncomfortable in his/her own skin that a stranger’s take on that isolation is needed, it is probably because there is some “underlying” problem that preceded the quarantine. This does not demean the profession, but underlines that serious problems need to be seriously dealt with, and self-isolation or government quarantine might not demand a psychiatrist’s couch.
When looking at this problem, I have devised a positive approach to isolation. These ideas will vary some from person to person, so it is a one size fits some; perhaps you can adapt my solution to your privation.
First, refer to the beginning of my rant. Do take some time to connect with the spirit of love and help through your Maker. Then, in no particular order do these things.
1. Follow ALL your doctor’s orders. This seems elemental, but when left to our own schedule makeup, something so simple might slip through cracks. The same goes for your medicines, making sure you also follow directions there..
2. Diet as prescribed, with allowed substitutes. All of us need “comfort” food from time to time, but we need to assure these do not deviate from the goal of keeping us healthy.
3. Exercise daily, preferably in walks which may be longer from time to time. If you have an exercise machine, get reaquainted with it. We’ve had ours for over ten years and have gotten a good two years out of it.
4. De stress when possible, but make an effort to do so. This, for me, is a priority, which is hard because it might mean avoiding unpleasant people or situations. But try!
5. Watch TV. In 1962, Newton Minow called TV a vast wasteland, and it hasn’t changed much. Stay away from news. Watch some oldies but goodies on DVDs. We are rewatching Brokenwood, a New Zealand produced murder mystery series that has more humor than blood. Find something like that which will pass some of the lonesome hours. Radio may also help if you can find something helpful.
6. Do something positive each day. Even a little kindness spread out will lift your spirits and the spirits of those about you.
7. Play games with those in your household. Even solitaire will help, but don’t cheat! Your opponent might take offense. In this household, I really am bad at playing dominos.
8. Repair some relationships that have been neglected. With the advent of cell phones and wide-ranging networks, it so easy to pick up the phone, say “Hi” and catch up with those we with whom we have lost contact. Our lives will be richer for doing this.
9. Don’t, in your isolation, become like Elijah, who, alone in the wilderness, sat under a juniper tree and asked God to take him home.
10. Above all, go back to my first and most important point. If we all reaffirm our faith in God, pray and meditate, isolation might not be so bad after all.
After as many years as we have been privileged to spend on this earth, perhaps we will soon look back upon this small patch of time, if not with fondness, at least as an interlude that helped us reconnect with ourselves and made us better humans.